Which is a horrible reason because I was using work as a distraction from my problems. I think that is something I have always done. Worked 50 to 70 hours a week in order to keep my mind off of things that are going on in my life. Cuz when I am no working, I am left to my thoughts. Thoughts that drive me up the wall!
So I am back, back to release my thoughts. To open up to the world again. To hopefully help not only myself, but others as well.
To start with, today marks my 414 days clean from dope. Something everyday I am so proud of. It still is crazy to me that I ever allowed myself to get so addicted to something that I hated for so many years. I still find it unbelievable that I spent so much money and time using something that did nothing but mask my feelings. At the time it made sense, at the time it worked.
Now that I think about it, that is the same thing I am doing with work right now too. Using work to mask my feelings.
Speaking about work, I have gotten myself a new job. I left the nursing home that I worked at for over three years back in June and in July started working at another nursing home. I love it there. It is a lot of work at times, keeps me busy, but it also has me using more of my CMT skills and knowledge then I was before. This new place has also helped me decided that trying for my LPN is the best thing for me to do to kick start my nursing career.
So that is my plan for next August. To hopefully be accepted to this accelerated LPN program from one of the best schools around me.
I am excited
I am nervous
I am scared
But I am determined too!
Nursing is what I love, it is what I am passionate about, it is a job that I would love to wake up and do every single day of the week. It is where my heart is, so I must follow my heart!
Something I was always scared of doing; following my heart.
In the past my heart has lead me down painful pathways, but not this year. 2016 really has been the year for me. I have finally put myself first and my happiness first and have been nothing but satisfied since then. Putting myself first has allowed me to enjoyed my time, be happy with work, with friends, family, and in my new relationship.
Yes, that is right, I am not single.
For once this is a relationship that wasn't rushed. We met back in March and dated for months until I finally worked up the nerve to ask him to be my boyfriend on May 6th. Dating him has been one of the best times of my life. We never have a dull moment together. We always laugh, talk, and adventure.
He's understanding.
He's caring.
He's outgoing.
He's funny.
He's adorable.
He's all mine.
I could talk about his for hours honestly, but I know that would just lead to me rambling. So I wanted to end this out by saying I'm back!! Be ready for more post from me. Hopefully ones that are helpful of course!
Feel free to comment, I would love to hear from some of those who read these.
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